Old Sayings

Wv67

Ten Pointer
I use , I haven’t seen you in a coons age or it’s been a coons age heard that a lot growing up , raining like a cow pissing on a flat rock , if a frog had wings he wouldn’t bump his a$$ when he jumped , dont bet on the races , don’t take any wooden Nickles , you done yet
 
Winnie 70

Winnie 70

Ten Pointer
Mama told me one day about going to the beauty shop to get her hair done, she came home and walked thru the door and Daddy was sitting there watching TV....he looked at her and said " They must couldn't get to ya" I laughed a long time on that one. Daddy had some good ones....he was bald headed except for about half dozen gray hairs right up front.....he would rub them hairs and say "I don't care what color they are just so it all don't come out " He would say " You can only get by using your hands, but you can make a living using your brain".....I remember that one in my youth and it has stuck with me 70 some years.
 
Eric Revo

Eric Revo

Old Mossy Horns
Contributor
tighter than a hair in a biscuit
been working from can to can't
darker than 6 foot up a bulls butt
easier than falling in the creek
faster than you can say "don't do it"
 
alt1001

alt1001

Old Mossy Horns
My granny is a real Godly lady and when something would send her flying off the hinge, she'd always say that it 'made her step into the flesh'. Lol. That was always my favorite.

A few of my other favorites growing up:

'All's well that ends well'
'That looks like fidos a$$'
'I'll tan your hide'
'High on the hog'
'Busier than a one legged man in an a$$ kickin' contest'

If a girl was rather homely, my dad would say that she could 'make a freight train take a dirt road'.
 
stiab

stiab

Twelve Pointer
Contributor
alt1001 said:
If a girl was rather homely, my dad would say that she could 'make a freight train take a dirt road'.
Click to expand...
That one was common back in the 70's in eastern NC. Also on that same subject:
"She's so ugly she could stop an 8 day clock!"
 

firedawg60

Twelve Pointer
stiab said:
That one was common back in the 70's in eastern NC. Also on that same subject:
"She's so ugly she could stop an 8 day clock!"
Click to expand...
She's so ugly she must have been beat with an ugly stick.
She's so ugly she must have fell out of an ugly tree and hit every limb on the way down.
 
np307

np307

Ten Pointer
Might have missed it but one my dad says and his grandma would say often was "I've a great mind to..." when talking about some prospective action (usually with a hint of anger). "I've a great mind to whoop your hind end boy"
 
nontypical

nontypical

Ten Pointer
When your trying to be a smart-butt to somebody but in a nice way:

"man if I had your hand i'd fold mine and throw it in"
 
Amazonchick54

Amazonchick54

Spike
From Pa, an old boyfriend's great grandfather: If ya can't run with the huskies, best get on the porch.

Well!!
That's a deep subject.

So!
So, what?
Sew buttons!!

He's so slick he could sell ice to an Eskimo.

Snot slingin' drunk

Six of one, 1/2 dozen of another.
 
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Ol Copper

Ol Copper

Twelve Pointer
If my grandmaw saw a nervous or twitchy person she'd say, " that feller is shakin' more than Jerry Lee Lewis."

If we saw a fast kid on the football field that nobody could tackle we'd say, " that kid has more wiggle than a bowl of red jello."
 
beard&bow

beard&bow

Twelve Pointer
Contributor
I remembered one my dad said to a couple rude folks.... Folks that just went out of their way to be rude... "Somewhere in the process of your fetal development, the nerves between your ahole and your eyeballs got crossed up, 'cause you sure gotta sh*y outlook on life."
 
nontypical

nontypical

Ten Pointer
When your dealing with someone who cranks the heat way up in the house or the car or even the office
"are you curing tobacco in here, I'm yellowing up"

When your dealing with someone who cuts the a/c on freezing cold all the time
"dang, ya'll killing hogs in here or what"
 
BarSinister

BarSinister

Old Mossy Horns
Same Irish guy...The funny thing was he had so many of them that he used them in almost every sentence.

If he thought someone wasn't telling the truth- You're like the Barber's cat, full of wind and piss.

Something that was supposed to be funny but wasn't-A joke's a joke, but a pipe stuck up a man's *** is no joke.
 
Soilman

Soilman

Old Mossy Horns
Contributor
He looks like he's been beat with the ugly stick!

To someone who just got a hair cut: Looks like you got your ears lowered.
 
Nana

Nana

Big Ole Nanny
Contributor
My dad used to say bottom upurds instead of upside down. A guy I work with says "That's harder than stretchin a gnats arse over a quart jar!" when something is difficult.
 
Soilman

Soilman

Old Mossy Horns
Contributor
One of my dad's favorites when the answer to something was an emphatic "yes".: Does a cat have a climbing gear?
 
41magnum

41magnum

Twelve Pointer
As I pushed "the limit"...…..mom or dad would say "son, you're skating on thin ice." …...…..and I knew THEN, to back down or there'd be consequences.
 

Johnnie

Ten Pointer
Like a hot knife through butter - when something was gonna be quick or easy
That dog'll hunt - Something was a good/smart idea, or a good probability of success
*hitting like a goose - having the runs
Does a bear *hit in the woods - when the answer was obvious
Drunk as a skunk - not sure why skunks get drunk
I've got to piss like a Russian Race Horse - not sure why they have to pee worse than others

I've only heard this one once and it really stuck with me. Around 1990 or so, a small group of us were invited on a dog hunt in Caswell Co, there was one particular person that was "that guy" with his truck and CB. Never got out, just kept the pedal to the metal trying to head off the deer even though we had standers all over the property. Every time the deer would circle to me and my buddies, this knucklehead would come screaming down the gravel road, skid to a stop, open the door and start screaming over the CB. He made enough noise that he flared several opportunities for several people. After the day was over I was complaining to one of the other guys about "that guy" and his reply has stuck with me ever since -

"Don't feel pregnant, you aren't the only one that got "F'd" today"

Johnnie
 
nontypical

nontypical

Ten Pointer
When someone offers you something to eat and it is something that looks nasty and you don’t plan on eating any of it
“No thanks, I rather chew on a dried white dog turd”
 
kingsize

kingsize

Four Pointer
-For an honest man, “he’s a real straight shooter”

-High class or wealthy is “high cotton”

Always enjoyed hearing phrases like these from my older relatives, this thread brings back lots of great memories
 
turkeyfoot

turkeyfoot

Old Mossy Horns
For spoiled kid " that one is purt ner ruint"
Slicker than peeled onion
Close door you weren't raised in barn
Madder than wet hen
 
BarSinister

BarSinister

Old Mossy Horns
Something we used to say when I received a guy on the jobsite not worth a darn.

If I wanted dead meat, I'd go to the butcher. Can;t get away with saying some of these things in today's corporate environment.
 
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