Old Sayings

fowlplay'n

Twelve Pointer
Was eating lunch at work today and an attractive lady walked by with a very nice figure and a coworker spoke up and said, “Boy!! She’s thick as an Alabama swamp possum.” Nearly spit out my drink.
 

hayco10

Eight Pointer
“Does a chicken have lips?”
“Two peas in a pod”
“When hell freezes over”
“Slicker than snot”
“It’s kind of nipple outside”
 

beard&bow

Twelve Pointer
Contributor
The funny ones are certainly of the "in person" category. Hahaha. I tend to lean towards the motivational ones these days(for me).

One that stands with me is my "signature" on here : "To have what he's never had, a man must do things he's never done."

One that my grandpa told me: "Knowledge is power, and power is everything. No one can take that away from you." I wish I had taken this to heart earlier than I did. Now I'm 33 wanting to be a student of everything, while earning and maintaining proficiency in everything I do.

Grandpa also told me "You'll learn more with ears open and your mouth shut." And "It's better to let people think you're stupid, than open your mouth and have them know you're stupid."

Something I haven't been told, but I live by and say.. So maybe it'll catch on. "Hoarding knowledge is selfish. Teach it if you know it." I believe I'll only learn as much as I'm willing to teach. I never miss an opportunity to bore someone on a topic they know nothing about.

"Be kind to strangers, you don't know which one is Jesus"
 

nontypical

Ten Pointer
Or I'm so hungry I could eat the horns off a billy goat
I'm so hungry I could eat the azz out of raggady ann.

I used one this morning I don't know if anyone has mentioned. With the grass cutting season coming soon, dad asked me this morning how the weedeater was running. I replied back "it's running bout like a 3-legged dog".

The weedeater is gonna lead me to start another thread for a replacement.
 

Soilman

Old Mossy Horns
Contributor
Someone who breaks stuff a lot:
Boy, you could tear up a junk yard!

Slower than next years Christmas.

For some guy who has done something really wrong:
He ought to have his d**k split and his legs run through it.

I'll knock knots on your head faster than you can rub 'em.

Mom: I'm fixin to jerk a knot in you head/tail.

I was once in a month long class for my job. We had folks from all over the nation attending. There was a gal from up north sitting in front of me that was intrigued by my "southern saying". Since the class was held in Raleigh, and I was the most familiar with the town, folks started asking me about places to go or to eat within walking distance. Someone asked about an how far a certain eating place was (walking wise), and my reply was, "That's a right good little ways down the road". That northern gal really got a kick out of that one.
 

old dog

Spike
-we do it right cause we do it twice
-growl we may but go we must
-if I gave a :donk:donk:donk:donk I'd give it to you
-if its and buts were cherries and nuts every day would be Christmas
-it's a poor workman who blames his tools
 

Greg

Old Mossy Horns
I always heard Idaho was where that well digger was located. I wonder which one was colder and if it was the same feller ?
The way I heard that since I was a teenager was ...

"Colder 'n a witch's t*t with brass bras in the Klondike." :D
 

nontypical

Ten Pointer
I remember one this old man said. He is the only person I ever heard put it like this before.

A buddy asked, "ya'll want to grab some seafood for lunch", the old man said, "no thanks, I only eat 1 thing that smells like fish. And fish ain't 1 of em".
 

sky hawk

Old Mossy Horns
Contributor
There’s a lot of variations, but some of these are so common that I don’t consider them sayings. (Gullywasher, molehill)

I always heard the dog was passing a peach pit. And so hungry I could eat the butthole out of a billy goat.

Mom used to always say, I brought you into this world and I can take you out of it.
 

nontypical

Ten Pointer
I used one yesterday that I learned from my old friend.

Buddy and I were riding in the truck when he started singing along with a song on the radio. Once he quit singing I softly said “wasted that money “ he said “what”. I replied back “you’re parents wasted that money “. He said “what are you talking about. I said to him “the money your parents spent for your singing lessons, they wasted it” he chuckled a little bit ?
 

pcbuckhunter

Old Mossy Horns
Contributor
Some that my Grandad used a lot were:

•Going around your elbow to get to your
a$$hole

•Ain’t got the sense God gave a ground squirrel

• Knee high to a short hog

• Eating high on the hog

• Happy as a pig in sh*t

• Going to go see a man about a dog

•The squeaky wheel gets the grease

• You gotta make hay while the sun shines

•This ain’t my first rodeo

• Beggars can’t be choosers

• Idle hands are the devil’s workshop

• Barkin up the wrong tree

• The sun doesn’t shine on the same dog’s a$$ all the time

• There’s more than one way to skin a goat

• We’re burning daylight

• Empty as last year’s bird nest

• Don’t buy a pig in a poke

• A Coons age

• Bleeding like a stuck hog

• Couldn’t hit the broadside of a barn from the inside







Grandma had a few that stuck with me:

•A watched pot never boils

• Too many cooks in the kitchen spoils the gravy

• You can’t make a silk purse out of a sow’s ear

• Slower than molasses in the winter time.

• Whats good for the goose is good for the gander

• Cleanliness is next to Godliness

•A month of Sunday’s



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sky hawk

Old Mossy Horns
Contributor
Thought of these two. They aren't old sayings, just sayings:

Two is one and one is none

Keep your booger hook off the bang switch.
 

KrisB

Ten Pointer
Some more from Dad:

"like Sherman marching through Georgia" or "like Sherman through Georgia"

"elbow high to a grasshopper"

"knee high to an elephant's butthole"

"There's more than one way to skin a rabbit"

From Mom, whose mother was originally from Hazard, Kentucky (she and her family were mountain people):

"I ain't seen you in a coon's age"

And we all say "fix" for making a meal, like "I'm fixin' supper" or "I just fixed dinner," but apart from that, "fix" means repair for us. We don't say "I'm fixin' to" do something like I think a lot of people in the country use it.

I'll have to ask Mom if she remembers any other expressions that her mother used. Most of our expressions seem to come from Dad's side of the family in NC.
 

nontypical

Ten Pointer
I think a bunch of y’all have mentioned don’t count your eggs before they hatch. Also that followed by “and don’t put ALL your eggs in the same basket
 

double

Twelve Pointer
Gotta go see a man about a horse.

The truth is welcome in heaven we might as well use it down here


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hunthard2

Twelve Pointer
Contributor
My papa had a lot he’d say. Many you men have mentioned already.
Rare as hens teeth
When he would be responding yes to something it was “Is there a cat in Goldston”

One that will forever stick out in my mind as he would always ask me until he passed: “How fer(far) is it from a cats nose to the end of his tail?” The response was “Fur all the way”.




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Dont take any wooden nickels
No skin off my back
You aint got a pot to piss in
Dont look a gifted horse in the mouth
 
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