Laughter Is The Best Medicine

Eric Revo

Old Mossy Horns
Contributor
A question to ask the doctor or nurse next time you are at the doctor's office.

Q: What is the difference between an oral and rectal thermometer?

A: The taste.
I worked with a Dr right of residency who was using the red thermometer for oral temperatures, he had no idea of the difference until we told him that the blue/white one was oral , the red was rectal. He was embarrassed to say the least.
 

BarSinister

Old Mossy Horns
Michael Moore walked into a sports bar late one evening. He sat down next to Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez at the bar and stared up at the TV as the 10:00 news came on. The news crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a large building preparing to jump.

Alexandria looked at him and said, "Do you think he'll jump?"

Michael says, "You know what, I bet he will."

Alexandria replied, "Well, I bet he won't."

Michael placed two $20s on the bar and said, "You're on!"

Just as she placed her money on the bar, the guy did a swan dive off of the building, falling to his death.

She was very upset and handed her $40 to him, saying, "Fair's fair... Here's your money."

He replied, "I can't take your money. I saw this earlier on the 5 o'clock news and knew he would jump."

Alexandria replies, "I did too, but I didn't think he'd do it again."
 

longrifle

Old Mossy Horns
Contributor
I recently spent $6,500 on a young registered Black Angus bull. I put him out with the herd, but he just ate grass and wouldn't even look at a cow.

I was beginning to think I had paid more for that bull than he was worth. Anyhow, I had the Vet come and have a look at him. He said the bull was very healthy, but possibly just a little young, so he gave me some pills to feed him once per day.

The bull started to service the cows within two days, all my cows! He even broke through the fence and bred with all of my neighbor's cows!

He's like a machine! I don't know what was in the pills the Vet gave him . . . . . . but they kind of taste like peppermint.
 

NCST8GUY

Frozen H20 Guy
I recently spent $6,500 on a young registered Black Angus bull. I put him out with the herd, but he just ate grass and wouldn't even look at a cow.

I was beginning to think I had paid more for that bull than he was worth. Anyhow, I had the Vet come and have a look at him. He said the bull was very healthy, but possibly just a little young, so he gave me some pills to feed him once per day.

The bull started to service the cows within two days, all my cows! He even broke through the fence and bred with all of my neighbor's cows!

He's like a machine! I don't know what was in the pills the Vet gave him . . . . . . but they kind of taste like peppermint.
That one went right over my head.
 
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